nodded and smiled at the growing responsiveness of the Saturday night crowd.
An icy fear suddenly burst inside her: a cold stream, forming tributaries in her arms, her legs. 'What is it,' she thought hurriedly, 'what is it I'm supposed to sing?'
Our song-our song-our song. stumbled through her mind-overlaid. "Birth of the Blues"? "Moon Over Miami"? Too late now. She had to think of something quickly.
Then, with a whispering giggle growing inside her, she said, "My next number will be: 'I Surrender Dear.'" She turned to Joe and smiled with a relief she hadn't known in years. He returned the smile hesitantly; twitched his shoulders as though to drive away a growing impatience.
She watched his jaw revolve as he chewed on the end of his tongue and flipped the coin too regularly, like a man who winds his watch.
FUTILITY
٤.٤
Hunted I have
But have not found
The spool with the scarlet thread
Fate wound;
Nor seedlings
Planted before the frost;
All things I see
All things are lost;
And ever and ever
The shining lure
Turns in my hand To a dust dry burr.
-Genevieve K. Stephens
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